It was pitch black dark in the den. After a long day, tired and frustrated I was making my way down to the breakfast room for some sense to be talked into me. For some words of prayer to be spoken over me. And there she was. Just a smiling. All sprawled out on the hardwood floor like that’s where she belonged. Like I was in her way. Of course because it was dark, I got a little nervous about what exactly was lying on the floor that sent my feet into an impromptu jig that could have rendered my body bruised and scratched tonight.
Then I realized it was her. And a funny thing happened.
I didn’t get mad. I didn’t think about how she got left there or who it was that should have picked her up. I fought the temptation to use that as a time to run that movie in my mind where I play the thankless mom who cleans up after the girls and cares for the huni and am often overlooked. Because it’s a reality show that plays on repeat in my head most days.
But not tonight.
My immediate thought was gratitude and thankfulness. I smiled at that ole barbie. Because I thought about my little girls and the great joy that they bring me everyday. I thought about how much fun I have playing with them and how much happiness I receive when they are happy. And let me tell you, after a day like today when we run out of time for afternoon naps and have to endure each other in our sleepiest, crankiest of states, these were gooooood thoughts to dwell on. And a sure blessing from God and a sign of His growing me that these were among the first thoughts to spring into my psyche.
This job of being mom and wife is hard. And everyday carries with it a new challenge, a new opportunity for me to get over myself and enjoy this life I have been given, to see my children and husband as gifts, not burdens and to realize that I am so blessed to have this family of mine. On the sunny days and the rainy ones. While the babies are napping and when they’re running off of remnants of last night’s sleep. Oh, Pamela. That you would count it all joy.
Tonight I tripped over a barbie doll and instead of wanting to throw her out of the nearest window, I smiled, placed her in her “bed,” and thanked God for the little girls who clamor to play with her each day.
Rock on all you wives and mamas out there. You are never overlooked. He longs to be gracious to you and He always sees you.
29 Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. 30 And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. 31 So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. Matthew 10:29-31 (NIV)